changed:
-
Directions:

  1. Someone asks "Where is (insert person name)?"

  2. Activate the Cubemate Location Device (pick up dart and throw)

  3. Read result from chart below

Cubemate Location Chart:

  * Bullseye - "He is not here, but he is working on your problem right now."

  * Bullring - "He is not here, but he is meeting with someone about your problem right now."


<table>
  <tr>
    <th>Point Value</th><th>Response</th>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>0</td>
    <td>I haven't seen him yet.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>1</td>
    <td>He's not in yet.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>2</td>
    <td>He's getting a bagel.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>3</td>
    <td>He's installing computers/He's rebooting the web server.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>4</td>
    <td>Championship pool tournament.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>5</td>
    <td>He was drafted into the military and is serving our country proudly in foreign countries.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>6</td>
    <td>The CIA has told me to disavow all knowledge of that person.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>7</td>
    <td>I think the aliens got him.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>8</td>
    <td>Purchasing large amounts of animal feed.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>9</td>
    <td>He's in Potter.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>10</td>
    <td>Gone drinkin.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>11</td>
    <td>I think he went to a job fair.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>12</td>
    <td>In class.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>13</td>
    <td>He's on his smoke break.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>14</td>
    <td>Training for a NASCAR race.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>15</td>
    <td>Bathroom break.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>16</td>
    <td>He went to the Windows World convention in LA.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>17</td>
    <td>Clippy attacked him.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>18</td>
    <td>He's in Mexico for tax reasons.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>19</td>
    <td>Upgrading the network infrastructure for parallel, redundent, high-speed file access.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>20</td>
    <td>He's at lunch.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>21</td>
    <td>Drinking fountain.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>22</td>
    <td>Jury duty.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>24</td>
    <td>Campaigning for public office.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>25</td>
    <td>He is in a meeting to discuss your problem.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>26</td>
    <td>He's dead Jim.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>27</td>
    <td>I can't tell you due to that FBI guy around the corner.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>28</td>
    <td>He's in a lab.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>30</td>
    <td>He's in the machine room.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>32</td>
    <td>The network ate him.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>33</td>
    <td>He said to tell you, "(insert string here".  He said that you would know what that meant.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>34</td>
    <td>He ate Atomic flavord wings at Veno's and is in the hospital to have his appendix removed.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>36</td>
    <td>Scotty beamed him up.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>38</td>
    <td>He left to follow the rainbow to a pot of gold.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>39</td>
    <td>He's trapped in the basement.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>40</td>
    <td>Venture capitalists gave him a bag of money to start a web-based company.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>42</td>
    <td>One word, "(insert word here)".</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>45</td>
    <td>His brain had a kernel oops and he had to leave.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>48</td>
    <td>Sssh, he's asleep under his desk.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>50</td>
    <td>I don't know where he is, only that he is working on your problem right now.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>51</td>
    <td>I don't know who you are talking about.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>54</td>
    <td>Consult your inner chi and the answer will become obvious.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>57</td>
    <td>Wax on, wax off.</td>
  </tr>

  <tr>
    <td>60</td>
    <td>He's not coming back until you buy him a lunch.</td>
  </tr>
</table>