CLEVELAND, Ohio -- Joe Thomas fought off the tears throughout his retirement press conference Monday -- until he thanked his loyal and faithful Browns fan at the end of his 18-minute speech.
"You guys were the ones that took me in as one of your own,'' he said. "The grit, passion, toughness and determination that you display on a daily basis is an inspiration for myself and for all of my teammates and all of the people that wear 'Cleveland' across their chest. You guys taught me what it means to be a Clevelander. Playing in front of the greatest fans in the NFL is easily the greatest honor that I have had in my 11-year career.
"I hope I was able to make you guys proud in the way that I was always proud when I told people boldly that I am a Cleveland Brown. The excitement I had for my team and my city never wavered, no matter what the circumstances. It is with all of this, that I must say goodbye.''
As the word 'goodbye' escaped his lips, his voice cracked and the tears welled up in his eyes. He immediately took a big swig of water to keep more H20 going in than coming out at that moment.
"Doing good; I am almost there,'' he said, composing himself for the last few words of his opening remarks, before a 14-minute question and answer session. "Goodbye not because I am retiring but because I am merely changing jobs - from being your left tackle to being the No. 1 fan of the Cleveland Browns. Thank you."
He accomplished his stated goal at the outset not to make this a somber occasion, even though he bleeds orange and brown and would still be playing if his surgically-repaired left knee had not cried "uncle.''
"I hope I am able to control my tears, but in case, I don't, I wanted to make sure everyone understands that this is a day for me to celebrate and also to give thanks,'' he said. "Hopefully, everyone enjoys the day as much as I know I am.''
But just when he thought the tough part of the presser was over and that he could take a breath and answer some questions, the local beat writers announced to him that they were naming the annual Browns Player of the Year Award after him, and the tears came rushing to his eyes again. Thomas won the award twice himself in 2014 and 2016.
"Thank you, guys, that means a lot,'' Thomas said, wiping away one of those tears.
For most of the press conference, Thomas used the same excellent technique during his retirement press conference that he did in his 11-year Hall of Fame career: instead of crying his way through it, he opted to make everyone laugh instead.
"This offseason, there were a lot of people that reached out to me when they heard I was considering retirement,'' he deadpanned. "One of the guys who actually talked to me was Kyle Shanahan. He put together a 32-point slide presentation in a PowerPoint telling me why I needed to come back; unfortunately, that did not work. Ray Farmer tried to text me but it was during a game, and unfortunately, he was suspended for that. Eric Mangini wanted to reach out to me because I had a couple years with him and he thought it was important to hear a few things from him, but unfortunately, he said I was going to have to ride eight hours with him on a bus to Connecticut if I wanted to hear all about it so I turned that down.''
No one was safe as Thomas brought down the house by ticking off the comedy of errors he's endured over his career.
"Brandon Weeden still has my phone number, somehow after all these years. He tried to call me but he ended up still being stuck under that giant American flag so he did not get any reception. Sashi (Brown) tried to trade some information with me about my retirement, but unfortunately, it did not get in in time. Johnny (Manziel) tried to call me from the club but his money phone apparently did not have very good service. In the end, we all know that the reason I retired was because of Robert Griffin III; it was definitely his fault.''
The jokes put the couple of hundred in attendance at ease and reminded everyone that Thomas was the Browns' beacon of light during one of the darkest periods in team history. In his 167 straight starts, he went 48-119 and never made the playoffs.
Thomas retires after 11 seasons, gone fishin' for good.
Browns staffers were decked out in "No Ordinary Joe'' t-shirts, and teammates Seth DeValve and JC Tretter had second-row seats. Thomas' wife Annie sat next to him, trying to keep their three young tow-headed children, Logan, Camryn and Jack, still and quiet. At one point, Jack, two, walked up to the podium during Thomas' speech to marvel at the helmet emblem. Jack also laughed out loud at one of Thomas' jokes, and Thomas observed, "my son liked that one.'' Later, Camryn, four, tried to get up on the stage.
The press conference began with in introduction by Browns owner Jimmy Haslam, who said, "Today is obviously a sad and yet happy day for the City of Cleveland and the Cleveland Browns...'' Then he quipped, "Hue is sitting there looking at me like 'what in the world could be happy about this?'''
Haslam reiterated that "we will celebrate it again this year at one of our games when the number '10,363' (straight snaps) is inducted into our Ring of Honor.' He added that 'five years from now, all of us will make the trek down to Canton where I feel very, very certain that Joe will be inducted as a first-ballot Hall of Famer.''
Jackson and Browns GM John Dorsey the presented Thomas with a fishing pole and vest to commemorate draft day 2007, when Thomas went fishing with his dad on Lake Michigan instead of the draft, and had a brown trout in his hand when the Browns called to tell him they drafted him No. 3 overall.
On his first day as a Brown, he told reporters in the locker room that he'd make the Hall of Fame someday.
"I wanted to make sure my goals were as high as they possibly could be, so that if for some reason I fell a little bit short at least I could always say that I shot for the best, I tried to be the greatest, I gave it my all, I did everything I possibly could and I never sold myself short,'' he said.
With coaches such as defensive coordinator Gregg Williams looking on from his perch on a truck tire, Thomas thanked everyone in his life from his family and friends to all of his coaches and teammates, dating back to Pee Wee football.
"One thing that I learned from those coaches that I will never forget and it is something that I teach young kids about when I get the opportunity to speak to high school kids is that there are three things in life and in football that if you can master and remember from time to time, you will be able to be successful,'' he said. "That is be on time, pay attention and work hard. If you can do those three things in life or on the football field, you have an opportunity to have great success.''
He also thanked former Browns offensive lineman Vinston Painter for getting off the field in a blowout victory against the Steelers when first-year head coach Mike Pettine tried to rest his starters.
"He tried to sub me out in the middle of my (snap) streak,'' said Thomas. "I wouldn't have the 10,363 consecutive snaps if he would not have had listened to me when I cussed him out on the field and sent him out to the sidelines to continue my streak.''
Thomas sprinkled more jokes in with the serious stuff to keep things light.
"Of course, another moment I will never forget is the (former Browns Head Coach) Rob Chudzinski era. Both of those days were outstanding,'' Thomas quipped.
He added, "In 2007, we went 4-0 in the preseason and were declared 'Preseason World Champions.' That is going to be on my grave.''
And, "I just felt the time was right to retire because I knew that Hue was going to make the rest of the team jump in the lake with him this year, and I didn't think I would be able to handle it.''
In all seriousness, he noted "something I will tell to maybe my kids some day is when I got to 10,000 straight snaps and LeBron James tweeted at me. Of course, when I retired, he tweeted at me again. I would like to tweet back at him some day. Hopefully, that is not for a long time because I still love watching him play.''
Thomas got to do just that later Monday evening when he attended the Cavs game Monday night and got big bearhug from LeBron in the court.
It was well-wishes from all over the country over the past week that humbled the 10-time Pro Bowler.
"To hear all these actually important people, like LeBron and other people that are really important send congratulations and talk about what you've meant to them,'' he said. "... they were talking about how they looked up to me, the way I played, the way I carried myself and that meant a lot to me. I can tell you, I went through a lot of boxes of Kleenex the last week.''
Thomas, who will have some broadcasting opportunities in 2018, said "hopefully there's a future with the team. hopefully Jimmy and Dee (Haslam) and I will be able to talk about that a little bit this offseason and try to figure something out. But I think that's a discussion that's going to happen down the road.''
He said he could see living in Cleveland year-round at some point. But his wife, Annie, is expecting their fourth child, and they'd like to spend some time back home in Wisconsin near their parents.
"And as you can see, my kids are a handful so we need as many babysitters as possible,'' he said.
He said he'll take a year to figure things out but "I definitely want to stay around the game. I think a little bit of coaching. I respect the heck out of these coaches 'cause there's no way I could spend the amount of time that they do as a coach. But I'd definitely like to try to stay around the game coaching players individually, maybe do some broadcast work, do a few things with the team here.
"I want to be somebody that can be a positive representation for the Cleveland Browns and help them in any way I can without being on the field. Hopefully we can do something and I can still be a part of the game and be a part of this team."
He said what he'll "miss most is right behind me, in the locker room with all those guys. ...the teasing of each other, the fun, the daily conversations, the intellectual conversations, the arguments, those are all things that I don't think you can find anywhere else.''
So he wants to be Doug Dieken?
"I definitely want to be Doug Dieken,'' he said with a laugh. "If you can map out the perfect life, it would be Doug Dieken's -- and the perfect mustache."
As the press conference ended, Thomas posed for pictures with his family and with staff members and said his goodbyes.
His kids jumped around on mats in the fieldhouse and Jack begged to try on a helmet. Annie came to tears as she said her own farewells to longtime friends and associates.
But as Thomas said, he's not really gone fishing' for good. He'll be back with te Browns soon, just in another capacity. And he'll undoubtedly rock that one too.